Wednesday, June 27, 2012

summer bucket list.

my summer bucket list

“We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”

-Frederick Keonig

go through old flickr photos (see above picture)

go to the zoo

sleep under the stars

float in a river

read a book in a hammock

make s'mores

build a fort

nap on the beach

watch a movie, in a movie theater

drink a mojito

cannonball!

host a party

go on a roadtrip

write a letter

have a bonfire

watch the sun set

watch the sun rise

have a dance party

try a new food

play charades

make pasta from scratch

sell/donate most of my belongings

take a photo in a photobooth

eat saltwater taffy

jump for joy

go for a bikeride

print photos!

tell a loved one how much they mean to me

i'm hoping to take a picture of me doing each item on my list,

and making an end of summer post.

fingers crossed.

do you have a summer list? i'd love to see!

Monday, June 25, 2012

separation anxienty.

the past few days have been rough, to say the least.

i remember m's pediatrician telling me that,

 at around fifteen months, they see a surge of separation anxiety in most kids.

well, like clockwork, on her fifteen month birthday it kicked in...

on superdrive.

if i take more than a step away from her,

she screams at the top of her lungs and thrashes her body.

it's awful.

and stifling.

even ivo is unable to soothe or calm her down.

i feel terrible that, a few times this weekend, 

i wanted to run, screaming from my house.

i just wanted to get away.

it's made me feel really down.

i  feel terrible that she's scared to be away from me.

is this caused by the fact that we're together 24/7?

i'm probably away from her, no more than, one to two hours a week.

is it too much?

or, is it something that's natural?

my friend randi once said to me, "the only way to get through it, is to go through it".

and, she's right.  

i just hope this faze ends sooner than later.

it's stressful for the both of us.

womp womp.

sorry for being such a debbie downer.

just needed to vent.

xo

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

wild horses.

Kalle Gustafsson

I love this image so much.

I want to blow it up and hang it on my wall.

It reminds me of my favorite song, ever.

Wild Horses. Rolling Stones.

Childhood living is easy to do
The things you wanted I bought them for you
Graceless lady you know who I am
You know I can't let you slide through my hands
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away
Wild wild horses couldn't drag me away

I watched you suffer a dull aching pain
Now you decided to show me the same
No sweeping exits or off stage lines
Could make me feel bitter or treat you unkind
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away
Wild wild horses couldn't drag me away

I know I've dreamed you a sin and a lie
I have my freedom but I don't have much time
Faith has been broken tears must be cried
Let's do some living after we die
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away
Wild wild horses we'll ride them someday
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away
Wild wild horses we'll ride them someday

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

father's day.

Boy, have I been absent.

Life, you know.

Here are a few images from our lovely Father's Day lunch.

We're so lucky to have Ivo in our lives.

He's pretty amazing.

xo

Friday, June 15, 2012

fifty.

i have been lost in a mr. grey induced haze, for the past three days.

i'll admit, i had very little knowledge of what the books were about,
except that everyone was dying over them.

after the first chapter, i was hooked,
but was worried that this was going to be another vampire series.
thankfully, it's not.

the books are certainly not the most well-written books i've ever read.

(note: if i read the word mercurial, one more time in my life, my head might explode)

but, i couldn't get enough.

oh, mr. grey.

i stayed up way too late, and woke up way too early to read these books.

i could not get enough.

so, so good.

oh, mr. grey.

i'm thankful that i'm done with them,

life can go back to normal.

but, i'll admit that i'm sad it's only a three book series.

i could go for a little more of mr. grey.

haha.

i consider these books porn for women. ;)

have you read the books?

what were your thoughts?

laters, baby.

xo

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

today is life.

Today is life - the only life you are sure of. Make the most of today. - Dale Carnegie

Friday, June 8, 2012

obsessed.

a few months ago, one of my instagram friends posted a picture of her delicious looking iced coffee.

her caption read, "the best iced coffee ever. thank you, pioneer woman"

as a coffee lover, i was intrigued.

i looked up the recipe and had to give it a try.

i'm hooked.

obsessed.

it's so delicious, so easy.

if you love coffee, like i do, give it a try!

let me know what you think.

xo

Thursday, June 7, 2012

walking.

here's a little video, i put together, of maja walking in all her zombie/frankenstein glory.

maja : walking from Kelly Huljev on Vimeo.


xo

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

what would you do?

when i was younger i was constantly afraid of death.

if my parents left me, for any period of time, 

i would spend the entire time worrying that something might happen to them.

it was terrible.

it was always on my mind.

if my mom was running errands, i would think about the possibility of her getting into an accident...

what would i do? 

how could i live without her?

thankfully, i grew out of the sheer panic at the thought of losing someone,

but the thoughts do occasionally cross my mind.

yesterday i was getting ready to run a few errands 

and maja was being extra snuggly.

she had her arms wrapped around my neck and her head rested on my shoulder,

when she suddenly looked me in the eyes and kissed me.

it was perfect.

and, in that moment, the sudden thought came over me...

"what would they do if something happened to me?"

we have the big decisions, if something happened to the both of us, squared away.

but what about one of us?

i know it's such a depressing and dark thought, but really, what would they do?

i immediately ran over to ivo and asked what he would do.

 he was visibly uncomfortable with the question and upset that i was even talking about it.

but i had questions...

would he find a milk donor since she still breastfeeds?

probably not, since she's older. but, he promised to soothe her as much as she needed.

does he promise to continue to co-sleep until she wants to sleep alone?

"she can stay in my bed until she's 30, if that's what she wants and needs"

does he promise to continue having my mom be a huge part of her life?

OF COURSE.

will he continue to practice homeopathy before western medicine, whenever possible?

yes, i promise.

 i didn't feel the need to ask anything about love and support,

because i know that she would have more than enough.

it's weird, but talking about it made me feel so much better.

his answers were perfect, and i was immediately set at ease.

i hope the fears that i experienced as a kid aren't coming back.

but, at least, as an adult i feel comfortable talking about it.

does anyone else have these sudden fears?

i promise my next post will be happier.

xo

Saturday, June 2, 2012

lunch at the park.

yesterday was so beautiful!

maja and i packed up our lunch and walked to our neighborhood park for a picnic.

it was perfect.
just my girl and me enjoying our day.

xo