In a couple short months I'll be turning thirty.

I've been thinking a lot about how much more comfortable I am

in my own skin now, than I was in my early twenties.

I had an idea in my head of how I should look and dress

and was constantly wishing I was something that I wasn't.

Wishing my nose wasn't so crooked or that my eyebrows were thicker.

Wished that I had bigger boobs and a smaller waist.

I wished that I was the type of girl with perfect makeup and perfectly groomed hair.

Every so often I would run to the makeup counter and buy tons of makeup,

promising myself that I wouldn't leave the house without it on my face.

I'd buy a brand new flat or curling iron, with the intentions of having perfectly done hair.

My promises would last only a few days, and I'd be back in my old routine of messy hair

and barely-there makeup.

I'd buy cute heels with the intention of becoming a dressy-type girl,

opposed to my regular uniform of jeans, t-shirts, and sandals.

Again, only to return to the comfort of being who I really am.

It upsets met that I tried so hard to be something I wasn't and that I felt that I wasn't enough.

I'm happy to say that, over the last couple of years, I've grown more comfortable with who I am.

I accept the things that I cannot change and, since having Maja, have learned to appreciate

the things I was once self-conscience about.

That nose I hate so much on me? She has it, and it's beautiful on her.

The light, barely-there eyebrows? Yep, she's got 'em.

 I still have my moments of total self-consciousnesses,
but for the most part I just reassure myself that this is who I am.
And it's okay.

So, I've resigned to that fact that I am not the girl with perfect makeup or hair.
I'm not a girl who wears heels (unless I absolutely have to) and is impeccably dressed.
It's just not who I am.
And that's okay.

While the little creases in my face are becoming more pronounced with age,
so are my feelings of self-worth and acceptance.
And that makes me pretty damn happy.

I hear it only gets better from here.

xo